Friday, October 15, 2010
I am the Face
I am still having a difficult time dealing with the loss of mine and my husbands first child together. It's coming up on a year that we had to live through this experience. November 30, 2009.
I still cry about it. I look at some babies and think that is how big he or she should be. Our child should be learning to roll and be smiling and happy and with us and in our arms. But God had a different plan.
It's hard to trust that everything happens for a reason and that some things are a part of God's plan especially when you want that one thing so desperately. After we miscarried, our world was completely rocked. Neither of us knew how to deal with this loss, we didn't know how to comfort eachother or talk about it. We both dealt with it in different ways, we shut down, we tried to forget, we over-worked ourselves to keep our minds off of it. It nearly ruined our family.
Praise God that we have been able to make it through these trials. We have grown closer to eachother and closer to Christ. We are blessed with a healthy growing baby boy that is due December 30, 2010. But that first baby will never be forgotten. I don't know where my emotions will be on November 30 as I remember what happened that day... but I will remember our precious child.